Hogans Heroes vs. Gilligan's Island part 1 by 
and 
performed by 
Hogan caught word off the underground wire
Krauts close to the bomb
Allies must rescue professor off unknown pacific island
intel at best sketchy Berlin infiltration attempt got messy
General Bulkhaulters briefcase may hold something of interest
visiting camp in three days photo papers send message
Japanese boat patrols searching time is of the essence
they can not get to the Professor
meanwhile on the island unknown specific location
but really between Guam and Australia
Mary Ann washing panties
Skipper eyeballing in the bushes masturbating
silly Gilligan is who she really wants
he gay running from it since day one
this was before they had rights
so he kept his lips tight
plus nothing really available in sight
Thurston agitated radio said company stock bad
knowing damn well them Jew birds than flew off with his cash
Ginger gave him head on a regular basis
figuring sugar daddy bank roll her next picture she could just hear the ovation
that fool broke he'll never pay but he'll never say
not after a taste of blondies head game
Libby knew everything happening on the island
Thurston never been no good but she keep smiling
she had a secret that made her snicker
the Skipper was way thicker
the Professor became lethargic swinging in his hammock half the day
out of supplies wasting the day away
back in Germany Hogan plotting hard
let's go with two diversions to busy the guards
town tavern barmaid slipped Shultz a note
NewKirk retrieved off the back of his coat
it was in ghetto street code
Niggas ignore me
FED surveillance bores me
knowledge is okay
but being broke is corny
plus me so horny
Death is as death was
wasn't kin I'm passed it with a buzz
Hogan read it and passed it to Finch
here make this make sense
Niggas ignore me
FED surveillance bores me
knowledge is okay
but being broke is corny
plus me so horny
Death is as death was
wasn't kin I'm passed it with a buzz
Finch said got it send someone to Nuremberg for three days
Hogan said hummm out of pocket extended getaway
Stalag 13 nobody escapes
we'll send Carter say he went deranged
they think he's crazy anyway
when they notice say he'll be back any day
cut a whole in the fence make them think he left that way
Hogan said Finch what's this all about
He said it says if we can't have the bomb then we taking Hitler out
We still need the Bulkhaulter intel
we're also racing the Russians to invent that hell
Hogan said that's as good as got
Lebeau produced an identical briefcase wiped a print off the lock
Colonel Klinks in his office turn on the coffee pot
Back on the Island life never changed much
biggest thing happened back a few months
some savages came by canoe
Libby flashed a mirror in their face they ran thinking voodoo
Skipper put foot up Gilligan's ass
Nigga giggling while he taking a bath
The Professor got off his ass and made a raft
Ginger said fuck that it won't last
lately she been getting hot for Mary Ann
The Professor said oh what's the use
Libby said well damn if you don't need something to do
pop so quick can't even screw
Thurston lying about all the things he'll be buying when he leave the Island
Man them Jews even got your retirement fund frying
Mary Ann think she psychic said help will becoming soon
Lilly said really yeah by the full moon
She even wrote a poem hoping Gilligan would notice
Yesterday was today
tomorrow already came this way
we have to find it up ahead
when we get there
we'll love where it led
That cheered the Professor spirits
genius instantly memorized it and repeated it out clearly
Yesterday was today
tomorrow already came this way
we have to find it up ahead
when we get there
we'll love where it led
Mission action activation Bulkhaulter arriving in camp
Klink nervous on the steps straightens cap
Lebeau corner posted making sure briefcase fits the one secretaries office holding
Bulkhaulter creature of habit yup the same
Hogan been playing week long psych game
saying he's thinking of defecting Allies getting lame
Axis strong Klink you can be promoted pass on the fame
It should be associated with Bulkhaulter's name
call me when he comes
like clock work Hogan summoned
then all of a sudden fire outside the east gate
then boom explosion outside the west gate
Bulhalter bolts for the door leaving his case
Hogan slips the dummy from out the secretaries closet
switch-a-roo fire General I wonder what caused it
guards report a hole in the fence
headcount Shultz so dumb they had to tell him he missed
He started putting weight on Finch
Carter been talking crazy lately said he was going to the hospital to have a baby
be back in four days - maybe
dismissed confined to the barracks - you could tell Shultz dumb ass worried
Lebeau took pictures Hogan moving to switch back cases
Colonel Klink I wasn't finished explaining
and I apologive we thought Carter was just playing with what he was saying
Bulkhaulter cursing up something terrible
throwing Russian front in Klinks facing saying the cold is unbearable
said I got to take a shit and Klink your career's toilet paper
Hogan ready to make switch with him out the way
Colonel pour yourself a drink it gets better
Klink turned his back just about to pull the case out the leather
ma fucker in stepped Major Haustetler Gestapo meddler
same time Gilligan on the sand feeding a lizard
looked up when he heard a motor whizzing
rising sun flag motor raft and about four faces round like moons
the radio said they're the enemy shit they where shipwrecked since before world war two
Gilligan's dashing down the trial to give the news
Thurston ain't no dummy looked at the Professor said they'll want you
Our pictures and bios were posted when we got marooned
Skipper said not without a fight we crew
Gilligan said there's something else we can do
he said some shit they ain't have a clue
Hogan's Heroes and Gilligan Island
my favorite shows growing up in Baltimore Maryland
Hogan taught me how to be slick
Gilligan taught me took look at the world and laugh at it
now I make shows clash like worlds
There's a whole lot that can happen in the word
Skipper said your island little buddy whose Hogan
you're were from San Diego and thats not my finger let go
Hogan's Heroes and Gilligan Island
my favorite shows growing up in Baltimore Maryland
Hogan taught me how to be slick
Gilligan taught me took look at the world and laugh at it
now I make shows clash like worlds
There's a whole lot that can happen in the word
stay posted for Part II coming in February.
and performed by
Hogan caught word off the underground wire
Krauts close to the bomb
Allies must rescue professor off unknown pacific island
intel at best sketchy Berlin infiltration attempt got messy
General Bulkhaulters briefcase may hold something of interest
visiting camp in three days photo papers send message
Japanese boat patrols searching time is of the essence
they can not get to the Professor
meanwhile on the island unknown specific location
but really between Guam and Australia
Mary Ann washing panties
Skipper eyeballing in the bushes masturbating
silly Gilligan is who she really wants
he gay running from it since day one
this was before they had rights
so he kept his lips tight
plus nothing really available in sight
Thurston agitated radio said company stock bad
knowing damn well them Jew birds than flew off with his cash
Ginger gave him head on a regular basis
figuring sugar daddy bank roll her next picture she could just hear the ovation
that fool broke he'll never pay but he'll never say
not after a taste of blondies head game
Libby knew everything happening on the island
Thurston never been no good but she keep smiling
she had a secret that made her snicker
the Skipper was way thicker
the Professor became lethargic swinging in his hammock half the day
out of supplies wasting the day away
back in Germany Hogan plotting hard
let's go with two diversions to busy the guards
town tavern barmaid slipped Shultz a note
NewKirk retrieved off the back of his coat
it was in ghetto street code
Niggas ignore me
FED surveillance bores me
knowledge is okay
but being broke is corny
plus me so horny
Death is as death was
wasn't kin I'm passed it with a buzz
Hogan read it and passed it to Finch
here make this make sense
Niggas ignore me
FED surveillance bores me
knowledge is okay
but being broke is corny
plus me so horny
Death is as death was
wasn't kin I'm passed it with a buzz
Finch said got it send someone to Nuremberg for three days
Hogan said hummm out of pocket extended getaway
Stalag 13 nobody escapes
we'll send Carter say he went deranged
they think he's crazy anyway
when they notice say he'll be back any day
cut a whole in the fence make them think he left that way
Hogan said Finch what's this all about
He said it says if we can't have the bomb then we taking Hitler out
We still need the Bulkhaulter intel
we're also racing the Russians to invent that hell
Hogan said that's as good as got
Lebeau produced an identical briefcase wiped a print off the lock
Colonel Klinks in his office turn on the coffee pot
Back on the Island life never changed much
biggest thing happened back a few months
some savages came by canoe
Libby flashed a mirror in their face they ran thinking voodoo
Skipper put foot up Gilligan's ass
Nigga giggling while he taking a bath
The Professor got off his ass and made a raft
Ginger said fuck that it won't last
lately she been getting hot for Mary Ann
The Professor said oh what's the use
Libby said well damn if you don't need something to do
pop so quick can't even screw
Thurston lying about all the things he'll be buying when he leave the Island
Man them Jews even got your retirement fund frying
Mary Ann think she psychic said help will becoming soon
Lilly said really yeah by the full moon
She even wrote a poem hoping Gilligan would notice
Yesterday was today
tomorrow already came this way
we have to find it up ahead
when we get there
we'll love where it led
That cheered the Professor spirits
genius instantly memorized it and repeated it out clearly
Yesterday was today
tomorrow already came this way
we have to find it up ahead
when we get there
we'll love where it led
Mission action activation Bulkhaulter arriving in camp
Klink nervous on the steps straightens cap
Lebeau corner posted making sure briefcase fits the one secretaries office holding
Bulkhaulter creature of habit yup the same
Hogan been playing week long psych game
saying he's thinking of defecting Allies getting lame
Axis strong Klink you can be promoted pass on the fame
It should be associated with Bulkhaulter's name
call me when he comes
like clock work Hogan summoned
then all of a sudden fire outside the east gate
then boom explosion outside the west gate
Bulhalter bolts for the door leaving his case
Hogan slips the dummy from out the secretaries closet
switch-a-roo fire General I wonder what caused it
guards report a hole in the fence
headcount Shultz so dumb they had to tell him he missed
He started putting weight on Finch
Carter been talking crazy lately said he was going to the hospital to have a baby
be back in four days - maybe
dismissed confined to the barracks - you could tell Shultz dumb ass worried
Lebeau took pictures Hogan moving to switch back cases
Colonel Klink I wasn't finished explaining
and I apologive we thought Carter was just playing with what he was saying
Bulkhaulter cursing up something terrible
throwing Russian front in Klinks facing saying the cold is unbearable
said I got to take a shit and Klink your career's toilet paper
Hogan ready to make switch with him out the way
Colonel pour yourself a drink it gets better
Klink turned his back just about to pull the case out the leather
ma fucker in stepped Major Haustetler Gestapo meddler
same time Gilligan on the sand feeding a lizard
looked up when he heard a motor whizzing
rising sun flag motor raft and about four faces round like moons
the radio said they're the enemy shit they where shipwrecked since before world war two
Gilligan's dashing down the trial to give the news
Thurston ain't no dummy looked at the Professor said they'll want you
Our pictures and bios were posted when we got marooned
Skipper said not without a fight we crew
Gilligan said there's something else we can do
he said some shit they ain't have a clue
Hogan's Heroes and Gilligan Island
my favorite shows growing up in Baltimore Maryland
Hogan taught me how to be slick
Gilligan taught me took look at the world and laugh at it
now I make shows clash like worlds
There's a whole lot that can happen in the word
Skipper said your island little buddy whose Hogan
you're were from San Diego and thats not my finger let go
Hogan's Heroes and Gilligan Island
my favorite shows growing up in Baltimore Maryland
Hogan taught me how to be slick
Gilligan taught me took look at the world and laugh at it
now I make shows clash like worlds
There's a whole lot that can happen in the word
stay posted for Part II coming in February.
